Let love, compassion and hope guide your life

[Desipura]

I have alot of respect for Harry O'Brien of Collingwood after having read this........

'YOU are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men."

These are my favourite bible verses from the book of Matthew 5:14-16. These words hold great meaning to me and my desire is to live my life in this way. I am a person who loves to find inspiration through many sources. I am easily inspired by the beauty of life and the infinite possibilities it has to offer. Whether it is art, song lyrics, architecture or even the sight of a mother caring for her child inspires me and sends shivers down my spine.

A major inspiration in my life is my family. During the mid-season break I was fortunate enough to spend a couple of days in Perth with my family. My family is going through the toughest time after losing my father just before the start of the footy season. Despite our immense pain, we know we will get through this. My family's resolve and resilience is holding us together. It is true what they say, "It's not how hard you fall that matters, it's how you get up."

If you look at the most important and influential people in history, you will find countless examples of how their greatest triumphs were derived from tragedy and adversity.

My sister, Raquel, who lives in Perth, is 16 and in year 11. One of her assignments was to write a persuasive speech that she would deliver in front of her class. She courageously decided she would write about her experiences in relation to the passing of our dad.

The day she had to deliver her speech she was very nervous. When her teacher called her up, Raquel walked to the front of the class. She went to open her mouth, but nothing came out. She could feel the blood rushing to her head and started to realise all the eyes in the classroom were on her. The pressure got to be too much. She broke down in tears and ran out of the classroom.

She called my mum, who told her that she had committed to delivering the speech and had to honour that commitment. She also said: "Raquel, what would Dad want you to do?" With the encouraging words, Raquel gathered the courage to return to the classroom to deliver her speech. This is the speech that she delivered, entitled, Suicide:

My dad was a family man. My dad was my hero. He was the most selfless man I had ever met and he would do absolutely anything to make my mum, my brothers and myself happy. He would literally bend over backwards to please us, put smiles on our faces and make our lives as easy as possible.
It was sacrifice. He was constantly sacrificing his spare time and his spare money on us. Whether it be volunteering to coach all my brothers' footy teams, picking my friends and I up from parties at ungodly hours or surprising my mum with a new pair of shoes to show her he loved her.

Unfortunately, life got so difficult and so unbearable for my dad. His final sacrifice was one that has altered our lives forever. It's one that cannot be changed. It's one that's definitely not easy to understand.

Suicide affects hundreds and thousands of Australians every year. In 1998, suicide rates reached an all-time high. Since then, organisations have been established such as Lifeline to offer support to those contemplating taking their own life. With the added awareness on the issue, suicide rates have been gradually decreasing.

But I'm not here today to discuss the prevention of suicide. I'm here to talk to you all about when it comes out of thin air and hits you like a tonne of bricks.

When someone takes their own life most people instantly question why. Why did they do it? Why would anyone want to end their own life? Why didn't they think of all their other options? It's so easy to question why. I know, because I've felt that way. What is harder, but far more important to do, is to try to understand that person's feelings.

Many people see suicide as a selfish option; an escape, so to speak. But what about the famous quote: "Never judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes"? So, let's get rid of this ideology that it's a "selfish" and "evil" option and consider the despair, the depression, the angst that the person must have been feeling for them to truly believe that their life was no longer worth living.

I can tell you that leading up to suicide the person is no longer themselves. So caught up in thinking how insignificant their life is and how much of a failure they are, despite usually being so far from the truth, to them, it's all they can see.

I can't even begin to imagine the extent of emotional pain people who choose to end their lives must have endured. The mere thought makes me feel deep sympathy and sorrow for all those who have committed suicide.

With the damage irreversible, the decision is huge. The decision is, in fact, life or death.

Shortly after my dad's passing I received some advice from my older brother, Heritier. He said to me: "Raquel, this year is going to be the biggest test of your life. We don't know why Dad did it, we don't need to. What we do know is that Dad loved us and would never do anything to hurt us. You've got to realise that at that very moment, at that very point in time, that was the only option that Dad felt he had. I'm sure if he could turn back time things would be very different. At least now he's found peace."