This will help you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSoRNm7w33M
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This will help you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSoRNm7w33M
Economic gurleeeeyyy boys...
Only 3 rounds to go here is the run down to the finals for the remaining contenders. In ladder order at the completion of round 20.
1. Geelong 14/5
Draw:Roos (H) Lions (A) Carl (H)
Medical: We're getting close to September. They are assembling a search party for Gary Rohan.
Recent form: Have lost 4 of their past 6
Is this the worst no.1 team since North Melbourne 1983? I think we should apply the Mathias Cormann "Jelly on a Plate" tribute to the Cats this week.
2. West Coast Eagles 14/5
Draw: Adel (H) Rich (A) Hawks (H)
Medical: Natanui & Venables for the season.
Recent form: have won 5 of their last 6
WCE owe the Bulldogs a favour by beating the Crows this week. After all it was us who derailed Geelong's season.
3. Brisbane 14/5
Draw: Suns (H) Cats (H) Rich (A)
Medical: Zorko in doubt
Recent form: have won their last 7.
A big percentage booster against the Suns possibly coming up in the league's most anticipated rivalry match. A real ratings bonanza for the AFL. 2nd spot is theirs for the taking.
4. Richmond 13/6
Draw: Carl (H) WCE (H) Lions (H)
Medical: Rance & Higgins for the season. Cotchin to miss a few.
Recent form: Have won their last 6.
If they win their last 3 they could pinch 2nd, maybe even 1st. They will wallop Carlton this week and I will win $50. That is the only good thing I can say about them. Actually, there is one other. Footscray beat both Richmond & Carlton in the last 2 rounds of 1973. They both still played in the Grand final and we of course missed the finals. but we still beat them. So stick that in your collective pipes & smoke it any Tigers or Blues fans who may be reading this.
5. GWS 12/7
Draw: Hawks (H) Dogs (H) Suns (A)
Medical: Ward & Coniglio for the season. Kelly, Cameron & De Boer could be back this week .
Recent form: 3 in a row.
They will think they are a chance for the top 4. it's a good thing the teams above them are in good nic
6. Collingwood 12/7
Draw: Melb (MCG), Crows (A), Ess (MCG)
Medical: Beams, Dunn, Langdon for the season. Aish, Stephenson, Wells up to 4 weeks, Moore for a couple. Maybe Cox
Recent form: have lost 4 of their past 6.
Ask any toothless Magpies supporter & they will tell you they should be premiership favourites. Back in the real world they have a lot of injuries and the currrent top 4 are starting to look safe.
7. Essendon 11/8
Draw: Dogs (H) Freo (A) Coll (MCG)
Medical: Daniher & Smith are for the season, possibly Hurley. Bellchambers & Heppell are doubtful
Recent form: have won 7 of their last 9. last game was a howler v Port
Lucky to beat Suns & smashed by Port. They have a lot of injuries. Their last 3 games are tricky. Suddenly looking vulnerable. Woohoo!
8. Adelaide 10/9
Draw: WCE (A) Coll (H) Dogs (A)
Medical: Doedee (season)
Recent form: Have won their last 1. But lost 4 of their previous 5.
It's all rosy again in Adelaide & everyone loves everyone until this weekend when WCE beat them up and everybody will hate everybody again and all will be normal again.
Still have a chance thanks to Adelaide & now maybe Essendon
9. Port 9/10
Draw: Swans (H) North (A) Freo (H)
"Show it to em Sydney, show em your the Swans. Show em your the winners. Get up where you belong." I worked at the SCG during the Edelsten era. how much I hated that song. It's etched in memory and comes back to haunt me sometimes at night and I wake up in a cold sweat. But I will sing it with pride if the Swans win this week.
10. Bulldogs 9/10
Draw: Ess (A) GWS (A) Crows (H)
It's perfectly simple beat these 3 and we make the finals so long as WCE beat Adelaide & Collingwood beat Adelaide & Essendon. Then Freo does a Freo & pull one out of the hat & beat Essendon. Then Port loses one but not to Freo. got that?
11. Fremantle 9/10
Draw: Saints (A) Ess (H) Port (A)
How are they still in the race? Three winnable games makes them this week's smokey for the finals. Ross is a genius.
It's Not Over til It's Over but It's Nearly Over
12. Hawthorn 8/11
Draw: GWS (A) Suns (H) WCE (A)
Can't see it. Can you? Wouldn't it be great if they beat GWS & WCE but lost to the Suns?
13. North 8/11
Draw: Cats (A) Port (H) Melb (Tas)
Great fighting spirit by Norf. Can still have an influence the next 2 weeks. If they beat Port I'll send them a Xmas card.
14. Saints 8/11
Draw: Freo (H) Carl (A) Swans (A)
Can't see it here either. Still could win all 3 & just miss. oh never mind.
Only 2 rounds to go and there are still 10 teams in it and another 3 who might think they are still in it! The AFL will be thrilled as most of the teams fighting for 7th & 8th will be playing each other in the last 2 rounds along with Top 4 sides jousting with each other. It's all happening folks!
1. Geelong 15/5
Draw: Lions (A) Carl (H)
Medical: Apparantly Dangerfield had a concern. Hope he's ok. Did he need crutches this time?
Recent form: WLWLW
We will find out if they are the real deal for the premiership when they travel to the Gabba to face the red hot Lions. 1st place is on the line.
2. Brisbane 15/5
Draw: Cats (H) Rich (A)
Medical: Nothing, not even Adams
Recent form: 8 straight
2 big matches against top 4 contenders coming up and all have a chance at top spot or at least top 2. Lions will not want to drop this one.
3. West Coast Eagles 15/5
Draw: Rich (A) Hawks (H)
Medical: Natanui & Venables for the season.
Recent form: have won 6 of their last 7
Despite doing us a favour and knocking off the Crows they slip from 2nd to 3rd. Serves themselves right for not belting them and boosting their own percentage and decimating Adelaide's in the process. Flogs! Could slip to 4th if Tigers do a job on them.
4. Richmond 14/6
Draw: WCE (H) Lions (H)
Medical: Rance & Higgins for the season. Cotchin could be back.
Recent form: Have won their last 7.
They play fellow top 4 contenders WCE & Lions in the final 2 rounds. Both at home. Lucky devils. The best thing the teams that finish 5-8th can hope for is that all these top 4 teams playing each other beat the living snot out of each other.
5. Collingwood 13/7
Draw: Crows (A), Ess (MCG)
Medical: Beams, Dunn, Langdon for the season. Aish, Stephenson, Wells, Moore, Cox have their concerns
Recent form: have won their last 2. Not in hot form.
Collingwood are our unlikely allies for the next 2 weeks as they play our top 8 rivals Crows & Bombers. We want them to win both don't we? So be nice to them and offer your support. I will do so by not mentioning Mathias Cormann and his vibble vobbles, nor will I crack jokes about Eddie & his mate Josh Frydenberg which I really wanted to do. I will also not describe their supporters as toothless feral inbreds that resemble the banjo player in the movie Deliverence. Finally I promise not to call Pendles Captain Feathersword like I did this weekend. Thats true. He came in to my place of work and I didn't quite recognise him and I said to my colleague "that guy looks like Captain Feathersword, you know the dude in Pirates of the Caribbean". He said "you mean Captain Jack Sparrow?" I said "Oh yeah, LOL". BUT IF THEY LOSE THE DEAL IS OFF! But if they do their bit and we do ours their reward could be they play us in the first week of the finals!
6. GWS 12/8
Draw: Dogs (H) Suns (A)
Medical: Ward & Coniglio for the season. Hopper has a hammy & Deledio is TBC in case you didn't know.
Recent form: They don't like snow do they.
I hope Bevo takes Clarko out for lunch this week. They are overdue. If not I hope it snows again. It shouldn't worry the Giants as they can have some time in the Sun the following week to thaw out.
7. Essendon 11/9
Draw: Freo (A) Coll (MCG)
Medical: Daniher & Smith are for the season, possibly Hurley & Bellchambers
Recent form: shit
The Bombers are this week's winner of the Mathias Cormann medal for having the vibble vobbles. The medal is a plate of disgusting green jelly. The talkback radio after the Bulldogs thrashing was fantastic. Their supporters want Wooshas head on a stick. They want to bring back James Hird lol. Please let it be true. But why stop there? Bring back Bomber as well and dust of Sheeds. They will need all the help they can get as they face Freo in Perth & the mighty Pies and their army of articulate, good looking and well dressed barrackers in the last 2 rounds.
8. Port 10/10
Draw: North (A) Freo (H)
Form: Getting better.
Two weeks ago they were rioting and now they are celebrating. Footy is a fickle business. That's not a scary last 2 rounds for a finals aspirant. But it is Port. They are like the weather and can change at any moment.
9. Adelaide 10/10
Draw: Coll (H) Dogs (A)
Medical: Doedee (season)
Recent form: Have lost 4 of their past 6
If the Pies beat the Crows in Adelaide this week I will listen to Eddie's breakfast show for a week or wear Joffas gold jacket
10. Bulldogs 10/10
Draw: GWS (A) Crows (H)
Wow Dogs. Wouldn't we all love to see us do to these 2 what we did to the Bombers. It's all on the line now but we still need some luck to go our way.
They Still Think They're a Chance
11. Hawthorn 9/11
Draw: Suns (H) WCE (A)
Thank you for beating up GWS for us
12. Fremantle 9/11
Draw: Ess (H) Port (A)
Will be kicking themselves for losing to St Kilda. A bit like us really.
13. Saints 9/11
Draw: Carl (A) Swans (A)
They are like that annoying fly that won't go away.
Ok I see we have a few doubters with my predictions for this year. Currently the ladder sits as
1- Geelong
2- Bris vagus
3- West Coke
4- Richmond
5- Colliewobbles
6- GWS
7- Injectors
8- Port
9- Crows
10- Dogs
This weeks games are below, Ive bolded out my winners
Mel v Syd
Blues v Saints
Bris v Geel
Crows v Pies
North v Port
Freo v Essendon
Rich v Eagles
GWS V Dogs
Last Round
Pies v Essendon
Swans v Saints
North v Melb
Cats v Blues
Suns v GWS
Eagles v Hawks
Dogs v Crows
Tigers v Lions
Freo v Port
This makes the final 8 as
Geelong, West Coke, Richmond, Brisbane, Collingwood, GWS, Port, Doggies
Finals Week 1
Geelong v Lions
Pies v Dogs
GWS v Port
Eagles v Richmond
Week 2
Brisbane v Doggies
Richmond v Port
Week 3
Geelong v Richmond
West Coke v Doggies
Grand Final
Cats v Doggies
Do you dear to dream?
If you are going to dream like that I think you need some refinement.
Get Brisbane over Geelong and Richmond over West Coast in 1st week and our run would be
Collingwood V Doggies week 1
Geelong V Doggies week 2
Richmond V Doggies week 3
and West Coast v Doggies GF
That way we don't need to travel and we can all get to the G each week and cheer them on.
Wouldn’t be surprised if Freo win the last two rounds
That's OK we need the Pies to beat Adelaide and Essendon to lose both (which they will) and even if we drop this one we can beat the Crows and slide into eighth. I don't think Freo can beat North at Marvel.
Make sure you stretch appropriately, going to be plenty of rooting the next two weeks.