Fevola faces axe from Lions

[LostDoggy]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

This.


I know from personal experiemce how important your addiction becomes. If, as is being reported, Fev is an alcoholic then having a drink becomes more important than anything. Family, friends, career. Everything eventually becomes an impediment to that one overriding goal in life. Due to his disease a addict will just consume whatever their poison is to the point of destruction.

Addiction is a discease that cant be cured. It can be controlled thugh. A bit like diabetes sufferers of addiction have to choose to be cured themselves. Noone can make that choice and it's mostly only when the addict themself makes that choice.

I agree with your sentiments here

[Mofra]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

It started in his 1st years at Carton when he ran amok through the Maribrynong detention centre with a fire extinguisher

Started earlier than that - he got away with everything at school and treated his childhood sweetheart (who is a lovely girl) like shit.
The alcohlism/gambling seem to be as much symptoms of a narcissistic personality as he has never been shown boundaries and lacks the ability to devlop them on his own.
Personally I think he is a massive wanker but he does have problems and, arguably, the support network available within the AFL is better placed to help him deal with them than he would be on his own.

It would be interesting to know what support he has now and has been offered in the past by the AFLPA, and if they would continue to assist him after deregistration.

[Desipura]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

Problem child like many kids 16/17yo are?
Being in an environment were instead of being punished properly/taught the right way/helped has more to do with his problems now than what he was like as a 16/17yo. Kids grow up, but if there is no reason to then no wonder he didn't.

Also I thought Fev has a dad still alive.

He may well be alive, not sure he played a part in his life though.

[KT31]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

Problem child like many kids 16/17yo are?
Being in an environment were instead of being punished properly/taught the right way/helped has more to do with his problems now than what he was like as a 16/17yo. Kids grow up, but if there is no reason to then no wonder he didn't.

Also I thought Fev has a dad still alive.

Desipura
He may well be alive, not sure he played a part in his life though.

Or maybe the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

[Greystache]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

Started earlier than that - he got away with everything at school and treated his childhood sweetheart (who is a lovely girl) like shit.
The alcohlism/gambling seem to be as much symptoms of a narcissistic personality as he has never been shown boundaries and lacks the ability to devlop them on his own.
Personally I think he is a massive wanker but he does have problems and, arguably, the support network available within the AFL is better placed to help him deal with them than he would be on his own.

It would be interesting to know what support he has now and has been offered in the past by the AFLPA, and if they would continue to assist him after deregistration.

Definitely sounds like that. If anyone has read Adam Ramanauskas' book Nine Lives, early on he talks about playing at the Dandenong Stingrays and some of the guys there. He was saying that it's a really strict environment where they don't tolerate individuals, and if you don't tow the line you get the arse. Except for one guy who was lazy, wouldn't train, and was constantly in trouble, but he was such a talent they made an exception for him- Sure enough, it was Fevola.

[Ghost Dog]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

Definitely sounds like that. If anyone has read Adam Ramanauskas' book Nine Lives, early on he talks about playing at the Dandenong Stingrays and some of the guys there. He was saying that it's a really strict environment where they don't tolerate individuals, and if you don't tow the line you get the arse. Except for one guy who was lazy, wouldn't train, and was constantly in trouble, but he was such a talent they made an exception for him- Sure enough, it was Fevola.

So much for not tolerating individuals eh? So it goes.

[ledge]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

So he has been a problem all his life and now we say its the drink and gambling because thats his latest errors or is he like Aker and blames everyone but himself?
From all I am reading here its not the drink and gambling if he was a problem as a child.
Its just continued into drinking and gambling.
Spoilt brat sounds more like it.

[Ghost Dog]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

Anyone here ever met him?

Any psychologists here with interesting views?

His facial expressions during press conferences or outside of police stations smack of someone not really contrite.
Almost sense a little bit of the naughty boy still not really aware of the shit storm coming into the window.

[AndrewP6]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

So he has been a problem all his life and now we say its the drink and gambling because thats his latest errors or is he like Aker and blames everyone but himself?
From all I am reading here its not the drink and gambling if he was a problem as a child.
Its just continued into drinking and gambling.
Spoilt brat sounds more like it.

It's no excuse, but maybe being a spoilt brat enabled him easy access to large amounts of money and therefore the substances which he obviously has so much trouble with. Watching the Ben Cousins doco gives one a similar impression - having everything, and eventually not being able to say no to certain things when introduced to them. Many have noted similar things about Cousins, and his apparent lack of remorse or contrition. I'm no expert (maybe there's a WOOFer who is!), but I have heard that addiction isn't an instant thing, it develops over time. If he has an addictive personality, ready sources of cash, that could lead to the excessive behaviours recently seen. I know I've already said it, but I feel sorry for him.

[Ghost Dog]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

It's no excuse, but maybe being a spoilt brat enabled him easy access to large amounts of money and therefore the substances which he obviously has so much trouble with. Watching the Ben Cousins doco gives one a similar impression - having everything, and eventually not being able to say no to certain things when introduced to them. Many have noted similar things about Cousins, and his apparent lack of remorse or contrition. I'm no expert (maybe there's a WOOFer who is!), but I have heard that addiction isn't an instant thing, it develops over time. If he has an addictive personality, ready sources of cash, that could lead to the excessive behaviours recently seen. I know I've already said it, but I feel sorry for him.

this is the reality he has created for himself and where he needs to be. Have it out in the open. Who knows what second catastrophe this could have averted? Drink driving incident for example.

If he wants to look at it this way, it could be a real opportunity.
Imagine the alcohol counsellor he would make once he recovers ( if) might look back and think this was the turning pointon to the right track - hope so

[Ghost Dog]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

It's no excuse, but maybe being a spoilt brat enabled him easy access to large amounts of money and therefore the substances which he obviously has so much trouble with. Watching the Ben Cousins doco gives one a similar impression - having everything, and eventually not being able to say no to certain things when introduced to them. Many have noted similar things about Cousins, and his apparent lack of remorse or contrition. I'm no expert (maybe there's a WOOFer who is!), but I have heard that addiction isn't an instant thing, it develops over time. If he has an addictive personality, ready sources of cash, that could lead to the excessive behaviours recently seen. I know I've already said it, but I feel sorry for him.

The gambling thing is the more dangerous thing of the two IMO. Wonder how much he is in hock?

[Twodogs]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

is he like Aker and blames everyone but himself?

It's more a case of the guilt associated with letting those that love him down. That and resenting those who have tried to stop/help him getting that drink or having that bet.

Deep down addicts carry a deep shame and blame themselves. It's not until you acknowledge you have an illness you have no control over that you start to recover and blame hinders that process.

With all the therapy and counselling Fev has received I'm sure he is aware of this.

[Twodogs]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

BTW Aker isnt an addict or at least he's never displayed it in public.

My personal and uninformed opinion is that Aker displays an antisocial personality disorder. APD is the new term for sociopath.

From my reading on the subject Aker displays some of the following traits;



Identification

# People with antisocial personality disorder perceive the world differently than most people do and may not have the range of feelings that others have. Because they cannot relate to others, they have no trouble lying or violating the rights of other people in order to achieve their goals. Some of these people are very charming and adept at manipulating others, while others may use violence or intimidation to get what they want.

Behavior

# People who have antisocial personality disorder are skilled liars and often quite good at conning other people. They may be aggressive but show no remorse if they hurt other people. Sociopaths often react impulsively, failing to consider how their actions could harm themselves or others. Many have no respect for authority and have a history of losing jobs and being expelled from school.*


Read more: The Definition of a Sociopath | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/about_5067762_de...#ixzz1AFsH9KOM



*I have removed some of this text. THe passages I edited out were not relevent to this post. If you want to read the whole text click on the link.

[AndrewP6]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

The gambling thing is the more dangerous thing of the two IMO. Wonder how much he is in hock?

Media has speculated it's six figures, but that's all it is - speculation.

[LostDoggy]

Re: Fevola faces axe from Lions

TwoDogs, I agree with you. Having had experience with 12 Step programs, it would appear that Fev easily falls into an addictive cycle, and perhaps it doesn't matter what it is - alcohol, gambling (I believe you can be addicted to almost anything). IMO, it is a disease, and he obviously needs help. However, until an addict makes the decision for themselves (and it is usually when they hit rock bottom, i.e., lose everything important in their lives) to get help, no matter how people try and guide him, etc.,things may change for a short time, but then they will crash again. It needs to be his decision, and him admitting to himself (and others) that he has a problem. This is a very tough thing to do, and takes a degree of growing up!